Thursday, 9 May 2013


Now, whenever you hear the word "depression" or "depressed" a lot of people seem to have the same views on it, and don't seem to understand how hard it actually is to suffer such a thing. I fall in the category of the severe cases, and some days it's so hard to even want to get out of bed.

Lately, I have had a bad the point were I have been planning my own suicide in my head again. I know I shouldn't do these things, but I know deep down that I hopefully won't fall so low that I will actually do something stupid. The past couple of days, I hadn't had my medication and every little thing had got to me and I just wanted to cry constantly, because all I wanted was to die to feel at peace not to go through this torture. It's very selfish which is why I wouldn't do it in the right frame of mind. I mean don't get me wrong, I love the people in my life, especially my other half and little girl but when I go through these stages I blame myself for not being able to get us our own house, or for being a better person. I do think they deserve much better, someone who isn't ill. Someone to take care of them properly without having to worry about stepping on egg shells when I fall into these episodes. I just wish it would get easier, and maybe there will be some sort of silver lining at the end of the tunnel for us all.


  1. Depression is one heck of a battle, just don't give up!

  2. Yeah I know, it becomes so tiresome sometimes..but I just try and take everyday as it is. Thank you lovely <3